To Laugh or To Cry?

I don’t know whether ‘this’ is an omen that I am fated to settle down and spent the rest of my life in sban or just a joke…

while cracking my head buat kira2 congak darab bahagi and digging into all my savings book mencari sumber2 downpayment to buy my dream house, I received a call from dad yesterday advising (read telling) me to buy this old single storey terrace house next to dad’s unit that my bro suppose to buy and now cud not pursue his intention because of certain reason which I don’t want to talk about. Whatever it is the question now is why me? Why?!!!!

Hubby laughs when I told him the news, he just laughs. Me? I don’t what to do so do both; I laugh & cry at the same time. I laugh at myself coz while I’ve been dreaming about my own house, org lain is planning something for me. And I cry because I know my dream will be short-lived.

I know the house is selling cheap at rm70k but I don’t simply buy property because it’s cheap. why should I buy it when I have no intention to move into the house? Its not my habit to buy things just for the sake of buying or just because I can afford it. I’m a practical person… I buy things that have a use for me. I’m not the kind of person who goes for a vacation and came back with tons of souvenir items just because that’s what everybody does. same goes to every other single thing in my life.

give me 10 reasons why I shud buy the house. dad give me 3 reasons. reason no. 1, my bro not qualified, reason no. 2 the house is cheap I can afford it, reason no. 3 the market value is high, good for investment. ok forget about adik beradik for a moment. all those 3 reasons takde langsung sebut tentang what i really want for my life. okay fine that 70k might not have any effect on my monthly pay check but that means all my savings will be gone for a house that serve no purpose in my life. In short it’s going to be a burden for me, an excess baggage. I’ve been saving for my dream house and still cud not meet ends. Now I’m asked to throw away my dream and throw my money for … for what?

hubby give me 1 reason, I shudnt be selfish and help my bro. hellooooo who’s being selfish here? is it wrong to stand up for your dream? I’ve not much personal achievement in my life, and I’ve not many belongings under my name except for a car which I bought but chosen by ‘orang lain’.

please help me…
I’m torn now. I really am not good dealing with this ‘family kind of thing’. the tendency to give in is very high. but if I give in I wudnt be content either, I will never be happy. if I refuse then I’ll have to stay away for quite a long time …

my dream house is a shattered dream? arghhhh…