An Ode To Beloved Grandma

Grandma or fondly known among the grandchildren as Mok passed away on the hospital bed on 10 june at 12.30noon. My auntie was the last person at her side before she peacefully closes her eyes. The word ‘closes her eyes’ was merely a cliché; whereas in actual fact she hasn’t open her eyes for quite sometime since she was hospitalized for the 2nd time a week ago. Doctor diagnosed her with intestinal failure, a condition where her intestinal muscle loosened; whatever she consumes will be discharge immediately. The condition leads to loss of fluid; medical term dehydration. She has no energy restored in her body, unable to move on her own; she was bed ridden for almost 2 months. Nothing was done by the hospital to rectify the situation, they told my mum that an operation can be done to fix the condition, but they did nothing until her condition deteriorates.

When I first learned that her conditions had worsened, rasa nak terbang ke KT sangat membuak2. But with my bro in law’s wedding last weekend, terpaksa ku tahankan hajat di hati. I was supposed to make a visit to our project site in KT, a trip where I thought I can kill 2 birds with one stone, but the trip did not materialize because the flight was fully booked due to the school holiday. Hubby offered to drive the whole family back, but that wud means more days off from work, sumthing I cudnt afford to do after taking few days off to attend bro in law’s wedding. All in a short span… time macam nilah rasa kalau kerja sendiri lagi senang.

My mum yang menjaga Mok sepanjang malam had just left the hospital when she received a call asking all the family members to gather by Mok’s side, her condition turned critical that morning after mum left passing the baton to my auntie assuming the day shift. I was preparing lunch at home masa dapat call from my dad, delivering the sad but anticipated news. Rasa beratnya atas bahu, jalan pun rasa tak bleh tegak. Although I didn’t shed a tear, dalam hati meraung dengan rasa menyesal yang tebal sebab I didn’t fulfill my responsibility as a good cucu. Mok despite her age and tenaga tuanya yang bersisa sanggup datang all the way from KT by bus to visit me when I delivered fahmi & yaya.

Walau hubby bawa kereta laju membesit macam pelesit pun we cudnt challenge the fate that has been bestowed by Allah swt upon us. Memang bukan rezeki ku nak cium arwah Mok buat kali terakhir. All the risk we took dengan langgar 4 lampu merah and potong ikut laluan sebelah kanan sepanjang jalan from Marang to KT sebab nak sangat jumpa kali terakhir ternyata sia-sia. Aku hanya sempat lihat jenazah arwah Mok dimasukkan ke liang lahad. Itulah pertemuan terakhir kami. At that point of time I allowed hot tears that welled in my eyes to burst.

Arwah selamat disemadikan selepas solat Isyak pada hari yang sama.

Doaku:

“Semoga Allah swt mencucuri rahmat ke atas rohnya. Dan semoga dia ditempatkan dikalangan orang2 yang beriman.”

Amin…