Friday, 29 June 2007

Run Forest Run...

ask myself : what do u do when u have problems?

I may seem like such a calm person in the outside, but inside am like a bomb waiting to explode. if u can scan into my brain, u can see birds and stars and comets cram into my head.

ok, back to the question above. what do u do when u have problems? there are 2 options from which I choose depending on the type of problem. I wud either keep mum about it or I talk to somebody. and who’s that ‘lucky’ somebody? No. 1 my soulmate, no.2 my mum.

I talk to hubby coz in him I always found strength. say, I know I want to do A but not B but I just want to be sure that I’d do the right thing, so I’d turn to hubby and laid the circumstances and see what he have to say. in most cases, he wud ask me back what do I want to do. that shows how deep he knows the strong headed woman he married to. he knows that I’m in charge of my life, I wudnt be swayed by other people. he wud always give the answer and encouragement that I ask for. but under the circumstances I’ve been (the one that I wrote in my most recent entry) I really loose it. and of course this is one crucial situation where hubby doesnt want whatever advice he gave me wud jeopardise my relationship with dad.

so i turn to mum. talk to her and try to make her understand my situation. it’s always been like that actually. as I realized if I’ve been put under a tight situation by dad, and i'm afraid i wud hurt his feeling, I wud always turn to my mum, hoping that she wud use her influence to ease the path for me. so I left the ‘matter’ into mum’s hand.

I haven’t received any call at all from dad since I left sban on Sunday, can I assume that it’s a closed case?

come to think of the way I handle the whole situation, i didn’t actually tackle it on my own. I drop the whole thing and run… like forest gump… run forest run. I’m not proud of it.

1 comment:

eiseai said...

i would run too. its not easy. people just think what they want to think by looking from the outside (she's got a house and a car, so i guess, she's living an easy life) but they dont know what we go through - children's expenses, medical bills, food, electricity, water, etc. that takes out a lot yet people want to think we tengah goyang kaki.

what else to do, explain? they wont believe it anyway., i guess. hope they'll get the hint...